when I was shopping today with my mom, we ran into one of her ex-coworkers and he introduced himself and shook my hand and was really friendly
and he and mom talked for a bit, and then after he walked away, my mom said
”He got fired because he killed three people.”
and I was kinda spooked for like the next 5 minutes until I remembered my mom is a surgeon
Captain Swan in 3x10 The New Neverland
your mums pregnancy scan was basically your first nude
wow allstate hitting the feels now
Interesting, this shows the probably of a child’s eye color based on the eye color of its parents!
My dad has blue eyes, my mom has brown eyes, and my eyes are greener than green.
maaaan if either of ur parents have brown eyes u screwed I learned that the hard way yo
Yes, hi I’m under arrest.
Fuck the police, if you know what I mean.